In Which I Judge My Own Writing Part X

It is time to judge the book I wrote when I was ten again! This book is called Spy Academy and the Secret of Ethelbertha Harrison, so as you can tell it takes place at a spy school. In this weekly feature  I recap a chapter and provide you with sarcastic commentary. 

Part I | Part II | Part IIIPart IV Part VPart VIPart VIIPart VIIIPart IX


Let’s recap what’s happened so far, because boy am I getting confused.

Our four main characters (Zoey, Laila, Reane and Patricia) have arrived at Spy Academy where they made new friends and have been divided into teams: Zoey, Laila and Bryan are Team 1. Reane, Patricia and Tim are Team 7. They’ve also made friends with their classmate Ricky and one of the school’s chef Door. Now Door does everything for food (i.e. threatening people over the phone), so when the teens discover a locked door and need a bobby pin that Door happens to have, they decide they need to get their hands on Door’s current favourite meal: chicken. Zoey bought a chicken all the way in a Dutch village called Castricum at the start of the Christmas holidays, so that must taste good *ahum*. Oh and Team 1 found a letter addressed to their teacher miss Heyligers from a man named André and the entire letter doesn’t make much sense, but there’s a mystery surrounding a woman called Ethelbertha Harrison, which of course the teens want to solve because they’re training to become spies after all. Oh and Bryan was in London during his Christmas break and was chased by some shady guys who were dressed as the Royal National Guard. Okay, so let’s start chapter 8: The Forbidden Chamber (actually ‘room’ but ‘chamber’ sounds prettier)


All the kids are back at school, hugging and talking about their break… Except Bryan.

They figure he’s just late and get inside after an older student tells them to. They immediately notice that one of the teachers, Mei Lin, is missing and naturally they immediately become suspicious. They are spies after all. The headmistress tells them that  Mei Lin will be away for a few days so they won’t have ‘fight training’ and that she doesn’t know how long she’ll be gone. At that moment the doors open and Mei Lin walks in with Bryan, who are both severely wounded (well Bryan is, Mei Lin only has a black eye). Instead of taking Bryan to the hospital wing or ER Room or something sensible that a school for spies should have, Heyligers takes him to her office where she has some creams to help. TAKE THE BOY TO A HOSPITAL.

The friends are worried for their friend of course and wonder what happened. They conclude that it must have happened in London, and for some reason Tim suggests that the Royal National Guards might be behind it?? Did I even know who they were and what they did at that age?

Zoey and Laila, as Bryan’s teammates, are the only ones the headmistress has allowed to ask Bryan what happened. Bryan is sleeping when they get to his room though, so Laila decides to check if his closet is neat?? At least that’s what she tells him because we all know she was just snooping around. Bryan wakes up and they ask him what happened. Turns out that two days ago the shady guys managed to finally get him. See, one of them had disguised himself as a man handing out free drinks and of course Bryan took one. BRYAN YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE A SPY IN TRAINING I KNOW YOU’RE ATTENDING SPY ACADEMY TO LEARN BUT ARE YOU SERIOUSLY THIS STUPID.

Of course the guy had put something in it and Bryan fainted. When he came to, he found himself in a dark room tied to a chair and gagged. He found out the men hadn’t been Royal National Guards after all (duh. Though it still makes no sense that Tim suspected them). He still doesn’t know who they are though. They asked him what he knew of Ethelbertha Harrison (dum dum duuuummmm) and when Bryan told him ‘nothing’ (which is technically true because he only knows there’s a mystery surrounding her) the guy beat his face in. He had been held hostage until that day, when Mei Lin stormed in and beat the shady guys. Bryan’s parents were waiting outside and now know about Spy Academy (which they should’ve known of anyway, because the parents not knowing where they sent their kids too is really creepy? Also I can’t believe they let him go back?? He had been kidnapped, held hostage and beaten, but they let him go back just like that??). Mei Lin decided that they should go to the Great Hall straightaway to make a dramatic entrance because she thought Heyligers could help. You know who could help? A DOCTOR.

Oh and guess what. Mei Lin is going to talk to the headmistress, because a hospital wing ‘hadn’t been necessary in the past’, but Mei Lin is afraid that Bryan won’t be the last victim. THEY’RE TRAINING TO BE SPIES HOW WAS A HOSPITAL WING NOT NECESSARY BEFORE.

Anyway, that evening the friends go to visit Door and Zoey and Laila tell everyone what happened to Bryan. They also end up telling Door all about the locked door, the letter etc. Basically everything they’ve ‘discovered’ the past months. Door and Zoey exchange the bobby pin for the chicken. Zoey tells her that she needs to put it in the microwave since it’s cold. You know what it also is Zoey? Two weeks old.

Okay since this chapter is pretty long, I’m going to split it up again. But I’ll leave you with a cliffhanger: they’re going to unlock the mysterious locked door tonight. Because why not.

Do you ever read your old writing and feel like the above gif? I mean, I find reading this book hilarious, but oh my God please tell me I won’t be looking back on my current WIPs like this in a few years. Anyway, talk to me about your old writing (our current writing! Just writing in general!) in the comments! Oh and speaking of writing: tonight’s Young Writers Chat will be about tropes and is at 9 PM CEST/3 PM EST!

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16 thoughts on “In Which I Judge My Own Writing Part X

    • Nothing against London, but apparently I thought the National Royal Guards were suspicious? Or maybe I just thought that would be a good disguise for the bad guys haha

  1. THE INTENSITY. Michelle!! Hi!! I’ve missed you!!
    I totally know what you mean about going back and judging your own writing, my old stories ARE THE WORST. Once I had the end scene epic action scene finale and my MC was like ‘honestly I don’t remember most of it’ because at the time I was tired and didn’t feel like writing an action scene. HONESTLY.
    So I’m in loooooove with this post series!! It makes me laugh so much (in a good way)

    • RIGHT?! SHIT IS ABOUT TO GO DOWN. Hi Becca, missed you too! Hahahaha that’s great I love it 😂 Wouldn’t surprise me if I find something similar to that in my own writing haha. Thank you! I’m happy it makes you laugh 😊

  2. This is honestly my favorite fully fledged series on the blogosphere, it’s absolutely hilarious! I can’t get over the name Ethelbertha (watch her be like 20 years old, right?) and Door. I unfortunately don’t have any of my own writing from when I was 10-11, but boy do I wish I did. 😂

    • Thank you so much! Haha I don’t remember what age she was supposed to be but young yeah 😂 Aww that’s a shame! I’ve found some more stuff lately so when I’m done judging this book I’ll have some more stuff to judge 😂

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