HOW ARE WE HALFWAY THROUGH JULY ALREADY CAN TIME JUST STOP PLEASE
I started Ace of Shades at the end of June and am still reading it. I am enjoying it, but the beginning is a bit slow and I’m just in the mood for contemporaries. So meanwhile I’ve been reading quite a few of those as well. Riveted has some summery contemporaries up for free this month which were perfect for my mood. In theory anyway lol. I didn’t enjoy The Summer I Turned Pretty, though it was a quick read, and The Museum of Heartbreak was cute but not much else? Alex, Approximately is a new fave though. Absolutely loved it. Expect a mini review soon! I also read Fawkes, as that came out this week and I needed to get my review up but… Eh. Not much happened? And finally I read a short manga called Cotton Candy about two girls falling in love. Though a bit short, it was really cute.
I skipped last week’s wrap up because I’ve been struggling with my mental health, stress and just lack of inspiration and motivation when it comes to writing (and thus blogging). It’s been really difficult for me to actually do something, which definitely has to do with the pressure of finding an internship. I absolutely hate writing motivation letters and that’s really getting in the way of me actually taking care of things. I did end up writing one for a job and now I feel like I need to take a nap for 1000000 years. I haven’t heard back yet which is not helping for my stress.
But that doesn’t mean I haven’t done anything these past two weeks. The start of last week was actually pretty good, especially writing wise. I actually ended up writing quite a bit, but then by Thursday I didn’t really have much time and tadah before I knew it I was out of the flow and it’s been really difficult to start again, with me feeling anxious about it again. The reason I didn’t have time to write on Thursday was because I went to Scheveningen with my best friend,which was definitely fun because it’s been a long time since I went there. It’s a seaside resort in Den Hague and since the weather was really nice it was beautiful to look at. I loved walking down the pier (which we did several times).
On Friday I got a haircut which I barely told anyone about, so it’s been fun seeing people’s reactions because…
I am no longer Rapunzel. I had been thinking about it for quite some time now but I was too scared to actually go through with it, so I didn’t even mention it to my mom. Two weeks ago I finally found the courage and showed my mom a picture of what I was thinking of (Kimberly from Power Rangers 2017) and since she was excited, that made me decide to just do it. I did have shorter hair when I was 13 but not quite as short as this, and I started to grow it out again at 15 so it did take some getting used to, but I’m really happy with it*
* My first reaction when I looked in the mirror was ‘BOY DO I LOOK GAY’ so mission accompished
On Tuesday my mom and I took my grandpa to Stedelijk Museum, where I work, which was a lot of fun, especially since he hasn’t been there in quite some time and a lot has changed since then. Though honestly that man needs to stop moving like he’s still 18 because the amount of times my mom or I had to grab him before he fell over on some piece of art was getting exhausting sdjgsh
On Thursday my mom and I went to the Efteling, which is a fairytale themepark in the Netherlands, which I had been looking forward to for quite some time now, but we kept waiting because one of our favourite rides was closed due to maintenance. Unfortunately this week they changed the info on their website, saying they didn’t know when it would open again, so we decided to just go this week since not all of the elementary and secondary schools are out for the summer yet and according to the park’s website Thursday would be less busy than the other days after that. Which was true! The longest we had to wait was 40 minutes, which is doable. We even managed to ride some of our favourite rides multiple times. I’m thinking of doing a post on the Efteling on my other blog, but if I do I’ll share it here in a wrap up.
Talking about why I often don’t write felt really good, especially after getting all of your lovely comments. It’s good to know I’m not alone (although obviously I don’t wish this on anyone!) and it really helped. After writing that post I immediately opened word and wrote quite a bit, which I really didn’t expect. Things were going great for the first half of the week, as I mentioned before, to the point that I wrote around 6000 words. I honestly thought I was going to be able to keep that up and reach 10k, which is half of my goal for this Camp NaNo. I chose that goal because I didn’t want to pressure myself too much and I have no idea how many more words I need to finish this? I’m SO close to finishing it. Like I’m about to resolve a huge plot point, but am I writing? No, because my stupid anxiety is getting in the way again. Even though I desperately want to write. Granted, I didn’t always have time to write these past two weeks, but I’ve spent hours doing nothing except scrolling through social media because I felt like crap and I hate it.
I did suddenly write a little bit yesterday evening. I’m not sure how happy I am with it, but I try to keep telling myself that it doesn’t need to be perfect and that’s what editing is for but dskgj Gotta love having anxiety and being a perfectionist :’)
Here are some tweets to sum up the time I actually spent writing:
HAHA YES I ACTUALLY DID THIS. All day I was struggling to get started because I was so tired and then all of a sudden I got inspiration?? For another WIP?? Thankfully I did end up working on my actual Camp NaNo project after but still
Here’s a snippet that I actually like:
wOW whAT a CoInCIdence ThAT it’S VAleNTine’S
Anyway, I’m hoping to get some writing done today so fingers crossed that my anxiety will just go away for a few hours
🐝 The Writing Hufflepuff 🐝
💛 Why I Often Don’t Write Even Though I Love Writing // A Cry For H e l p
💛 Amy and Roger’s Epic Detour // Not Really That Epic?
💛 The Book Blogger Insider Tag // Did I Just Expose Myself As The Bad Blogger I Am
💛 Fawkes // Bored and Confused??
📷 Aesthetically Dreaming 📷
📸 Plan Your Feed With Preview App
📸 The John Rylands Library // Absolutely Gorgeous and Magical
💛 Nyx @ Drizzle and Hurricane Books did The Book Aesthetics Tag
💛 Shai @ Cade Under Books shares seven favourite Harry Potter characters
💛 Sophie @ Sophie’s Corner shares 4 reasons to do Camp Nano
💛 The Orangutan Library talks about telling vs showing
💛 Fadwa @ Word Wonders pairs up books with songs
💛 Holly @ Nut Free Nerd talks about her trip to Edinburg
💛 Julianna @ Paper Blots shares 10 things about her new WIP
I’m probably going to be a bit inactive for a while, both when it comes to writing blog posts and bloghopping. I’ll blog when I feel like it, but I’m mostly going to try and focus on my writing when I do feel inspired and motivated. We’ll just have to wait and see what happens. Oh! I almost forgot woops. My giveaway ended yesterday, and I’ll be emailing the winners later today! If I don’t forget because let’s face it I’m Dory dsgjh
How is Camp NaNo going for you? Should we start a support group?? Are you enjoying your summer? Let me know in the comments!